Many fathers are confronting the often-overlooked issue of post-natal depression (PND), as they share their experiences of grappling with mental health challenges during and after their partners’ pregnancies. Aled Edwards, a father of two from Wales, has openly discussed his battle with this condition, describing it as “crippling” and revealing a deep-seated stigma surrounding men’s mental health.
Aled’s journey began during his wife Sophie’s pregnancy with their first child. He experienced disturbing nightmares, including one where he was fatally wounded while protecting his family. Initially, he dismissed these feelings as typical first-time dad nerves. However, when Sophie became pregnant with their daughter, Bea, the nightmares intensified. “I felt like I had no motivation to do anything,” Aled recalled. “It sounds really awful, but it felt like I just didn’t have it in me to have that emotional bond.”
The situation escalated after Bea’s birth in September 2021. Aled’s mental health deteriorated to the point where he contemplated suicide. “I started to overthink this and really focus on, I am the problem,” he said. Fortunately, the memory of his son Sullivan “snuggling up” to him that morning prevented him from following through. Instead, he sought help at an accident and emergency department, where he was met by police but felt inadequate support was offered.
Aled had previously consulted a general practitioner, who diagnosed him with adverse childhood trauma and prescribed medication. However, after researching PND, he suspected it might apply to him. Despite facing skepticism from some health professionals, he eventually received confirmation from a different GP that his symptoms aligned with PND.
Research indicates that PND affects more than 1 in 10 women and can also impact fathers. Aled’s experience is not unique; it reflects a broader trend identified by Prof Ann John, who noted that over the past 22 years, the rate of suicide among fathers in Wales has been significantly higher than among mothers during the critical period surrounding childbirth.
To address this issue, Aled took the initiative to create a support group called “How’s Dad?” in February 2024. What began as a small gathering of fathers has grown into a community focused on mutual support. “By speaking out about my struggles and looking to others for support, I have been able to enjoy watching my children grow up,” Aled said.
Mark Williams from Bridgend, another father who shared his experience, emphasized that the transition to fatherhood can trigger mental health challenges, even for those who previously managed their mental well-being. Mark faced his own struggles after the birth of his son Ethan, suffering a panic attack shortly after becoming a parent. He described a sense of isolation and overwhelming responsibility that led to suicidal thoughts, compounded by financial stress from being self-employed.
“It was the first and only time I’ve ever had a panic attack,” Mark recalled. He did not recognize his symptoms as related to post-natal depression until years later, highlighting the need for greater awareness. “My work is all about a holistic approach to parental mental health,” he stated, advocating for better recognition of these issues among fathers.
The charity Mind Cymru has reported that many men experience birth-related mental health conditions, with 9% diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Simon Jones, head of policy and campaigns at the charity, stressed the importance of providing support during both pregnancy and the postnatal period, acknowledging that these life transitions can present unique challenges.
In response to these concerns, the Welsh government has recognized the need for tailored support for fathers, emphasizing that emotional well-being is critical during the transition to parenthood. Strategies have been published to enhance understanding of mental health challenges faced by new fathers and ensure compassionate, person-centred support is available.
Both Aled and Mark urge for a shift in societal attitudes towards masculinity, advocating for open conversations about mental health. Aled noted the importance of reaching out for help, stating, “If you’re not feeling right, there’s no shame in that.”
The increasing visibility of issues like post-natal depression among fathers is a crucial step towards breaking down the stigma. As more fathers, like Aled and Mark, share their stories, the hope is that others will feel empowered to seek the support they need.
